I was not angry or confused at all about being called attractive so I’m not sure where you got that from. I do think I’m attractive but I don’t fit the white European/American/Western female standard of beauty.

This entire article is about the back-handed compliment in the first clause, “You’re NOT PRETTY but...” and that is what offended me. I never railed against the fact that the standard of beauty is set by a small fraction of the world that has the most power and media influence.

Did you even read the article or are you commenting after just reading the headline? I never said I consider myself ugly or unattractive. I said I don’t fit into the conventional standard of beauty but please know I had NO TROUBLE getting plenty of male attention when I was younger.

If you are a woman with makeup on and a cute outfit and you walk into certain situations (e.g., past a construction site, into a crowded bar, into a frat party), you will get male attention. It doesn’t matter if you’re stunningly beautiful or just “attractive.”

I also have done very well for myself career-wise and salary-wise, which I think has everything to do with my intellect, social skills, and competence, not the shape of my eyes. Your suggestion to go get surgery is incredibly offensive and troll-like. I’m honestly disappointed that trolls like to congregate on Medium, too. I thought it was just on message boards (which I avoid like the plague).

So please, crawl back into the hole you came from when you try to suggest that women have to have cosmetic surgery to model white European female beauty to achieve career success. That’s sexist and foolish of you.


9X Top Writer. Proud grad of CA public schools. Committed to justice & leadership development. Wife & mom of 2 girls & 2 big dogs. Love to eat almost everything

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