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This is such a difficult situation. I completely see your side and how that would lead the reasonable person to feel frustrated and even resentful that one partner is always carrying the entire load of managing the household and family. At the same time, it's also easy to rationalize why the WOH spouse does less work since they're outside the home and "bringing home the bacon."

I don't know how I would handle it if I were in your shoes. I avoided the issue entirely when I chose to continue working full-time. It was an easier decision for me because my spouse doesn't travel and he can do more than the typical husband. When we're both out of the house, it's easier to insist on equity.

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Anna (she/her)

9X Top Writer. Proud grad of CA public schools. Committed to justice & leadership development. Wife & mom of 2 girls & 2 big dogs. Love to eat almost everything